melissa

30Aug 2022 by melissa No Comments

Why and How to Become More Generous

Article

Being generous to others can be surprisingly good for the giver. You may have even heard about the research showing that generosity can benefit our physical and mental health. According to the white paper linked above, "Giving social support—time, effort, or goods—is associated with better overall health in older adults, and volunteering is associated with delayed mortality. Generosity appears to have especially strong associations with psychological health and well-being." I often refer to generosity as a kind of “usefulness" which at its heart involves cultivating an open, curious and willing attitude, and a commitment to hearing, seeing, and showing empathy for others. Here are some other ways being useful can improve lives: Sharing knowledge, expertise, and connections brings you into contact with more people and more ideas—it's a creativity boost.Giving is contagious…

11Jul 2021 by melissa No Comments

Constructive Ways to Avoid Communication Gaps

Article, blog, Uncategorized

Every day presents a new chance to either communicate clearly, or to stumble into confusion, conflict, and hurt feelings. One of the biggest sources of communication conflict lies in the gap between what we say, and how that communication is received by others. In this dangerous gap, the impact we intend can be distorted, as the recipient makes meaning from our words, body language, and delivery, sometimes creating a story that is not what we originally intended. These misunderstandings, if left unaddressed, can fracture or even ruin business relationships, families, and friendships. Each person sends and receives the information through filters or lenses formed by their own history and experiences. We can minimize the size of this communication gap by doing the important work of remaining active, intentional participants in…

22Feb 2021 by melissa No Comments

Balancing Your Leadership Presence

Article

As individuals we tend to lean one of two ways in how we relate to others. Some of us lean towards high connection, and are very good at developing and focusing on our relationships with others. People at the extreme end of this personality type may lose their identities in making sure that others are feeling okay and getting their needs met at all times. Leaning the other way, some individuals are very good at taking a position, and have no trouble sharing their own thoughts and ideas. The extreme version of this personality is someone who is completely attached to their own thoughts and beliefs, leaving no room for others to share and form a real relationship. People who are more relational tend to ask more questions and show…

16Dec 2020 by melissa No Comments

13 Questions For Year-End Reflection

Article

As the year comes to a close, it’s an excellent time to take stock of our experiences in 2020, and consider what we want more of in 2021. Self-reflection is one of primary ways we can gain insight into ourselves, and is the first step on any path to learning and evolving. I watch people grow through self-reflection in my sessions everyday, as they discover new insight and pivot to live more fully into their potential. Working at their best, they bring others along with them, helping colleagues to become their best selves, too. I've seen small and big changes emerge from reflection: · Noticing and giving credit to others in a team meeting · Creating new beliefs about others that changes their interactions for the better · Letting go…

14Oct 2020 by melissa No Comments

Staying Connected From a Distance

Article

Successful businesses and organizations have made ballet-star-worthy turns this year, pivoting en pointe with virtual huddles, team meetings, retreats and conferences. We are getting a lot out of these, but they can’t always slake our hunger to be together—to celebrate our wins with a meal, to have an ad hoc hallway conversation with a colleague that sparks an idea, or to laugh at a team meeting and remember why we do what we do. A recent survey from Morning Consult found that, for many people, working from home feels beneficial in some ways, for instance, saving time that has allowed people to focus on their health. But the survey respondents also reported feeling disconnected from coworkers, with many experiencing feelings of isolation and loneliness. We ache for in-person connection. Of course, our disconnection…

05Sep 2020 by melissa No Comments

Hard Work of Acceptance

Article

Don’t we all want to be accepted and understood for who we are? And to feel safe enough to share what we think and feel without fear of judgement? I think we are all striving for this acceptance and safety in our work and our lives. What we may not realize is that it's hard to make progress in these areas if we don’t figure out how to accept ourselves. There are many ways that we judge ourselves. We may find it difficult to accept what we consider to be our negative qualities. We haven't made peace with our impatience, lack of ambition, workaholic tendencies--even our judgmental nature! We may also be unable to acknowledge or accept those sterling qualities that others seem to consider as positive, such as our…

20May 2020 by melissa No Comments

Bringing Leadership To Family During Pandemic

Article

At work, leaders feel a responsibility to inspire, support, and align their teams. If yours is one of many families spending lots of time at home together during the pandemic, you may find yourself needing those same leadership skills in your family relationships. If we tend to be in a CEO role at home, we may be noticing some connections between this leadership role and the one we have at work. Are there lessons we can carry between one role and another? How are you helping to lead in terms of empathy, inclusion, support and inspiration within your family? I’d like to share a couple of the most helpful actions we have been taking at my house (I have a spouse and 3 kids) to support one another during this…

18Apr 2020 by melissa No Comments

Six Actions Working for Leaders Right Now

Article, Uncategorized

With a pandemic at hand, plenty of things have gone wrong. But as I work with my clients, I also notice some things that are going right as leaders work to strengthen their organizations. Leaders are taking actions and initiating changes that will improve their businesses, not just during difficult circumstances, but into the post-pandemic future. Here are six amazing, effective actions leaders are taking right now: Building Closer Connections: Leaders are maintaining and enhancing connections in the workplace at a time when most people are working remotely, and usually alone. Online meetings and phone calls contain more immediate, in-the moment conversations about feelings, priorities, and actions, which helps employees feel connected, often more so than before the pandemic hit. Discussions about what is happening for people right now, today, are…

13Apr 2020 by melissa No Comments

What Meaning Can We Make Today?

Article

Over the last couple of weeks, many of the conversations I’ve been having with clients have led us to an important topic: the ways we are struggling to make meaning today, knowing that our future is no longer something that is promised. Of course, the future never is promised, but we all had plans for next year, this summer, and even next week, that we are no longer sure we'll be able to carry out. Just planning for tomorrow feels like a challenge. As it turns out, a lot of the meaning we make of our lives happens when we set our wonderful goals and work on fulfilling them over time. How do we make meaning in our lives, when we aren’t sure what tomorrow will bring? It’s a time…

15Feb 2020 by melissa No Comments

Three Things That Can Block Our Empathy

Article

Most of us would like for others to understand, recognize, and share in our feelings, and it can be demoralizing, lonely and painful to experience another person’s lack of empathy. In business, this can affect employees, and can also lead to a poor understanding about what customers might need or want. So how do we get closer to the empathy that makes the world an easier place, and helps our businesses work more smoothly inside and out? For a start, we can look at what blocks the natural empathy inside us. Lack of empathy can be the result of exhaustion, distraction, or stress. But a few common roadblocks to empathy trip people up even when they are feeling great. I have found that paying attention to such roadblocks has helped…